Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Mommy Challenge #5: Being a (Super)Woman

Yesterday morning I was watching my favorite guilty pleasure, the fourth hour of the Today show with Kathie Lee and Hoda, and a very interesting topic came up...Mommy Guilt.  According to a poll on Baby Center, "94 percent of moms say they feel guilty."

Let me repeat that...94% of Moms say they feel guilty.  The causes of that guilt?  Anything from not breastfeeding for 6 months to a year (or at all) to going back to work (or not).

So out of curiosity, how are we as women supposed to...

::Breastfeed for 6 months to a year
::While going back to work (hoping your milk won't dry up)
::Or not going back to work (and all the guilt that could be associated with that)
::While making sure your household is maintained
::The grocery shopping is done
::Your marriage/relationship is still fresh and exciting
::You're keeping up with Thank You's, Baby Announcements and other friend's life events
::Your social life doesn't die (completely)
::And oh ya...that baby weight?  That's supposed to melt away too...

As the article states, "Guilt is the great equalizer among all moms, regardless of how diverse our backgrounds or circumstances are."  True statement.

So how do we, as women and as Moms, help each other out?  Set realistic expectations? Realize that balance in life means something different to each and every person?  That we can't do everything? And that that's okay...

I'm not afraid to admit that I've been experiencing some of these guilty feelings and I'm still on Maternity leave!!! 

Abigail is only 10 weeks old and I find myself thinking far too much about working vs. not working...wanting to breastfeed as long as possible but being afraid that going back to work will be the end of it...wanting to be around as much as possible to help Abigail develop and still have something that's "my own"...

All these conflicting feelings and thoughts have been making me feel like a crazy woman lately.  Why do we put so much pressure on ourselves to be superwomen?  To be perfect? To do everything?  

I think what we (ok, what I) need to work on is figuring out what works best for us...as individuals...being confident in our decisions...being realistic that we can't do everything...being okay with plans changing...and quite simply, being the best Moms we can be.  I think I can handle that much...

So what do you think?  Have you experienced similar feelings/dilemmas? 

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